Premarital counseling?

[Agape Gems]

Just curious if anyone is doing religious pre-marital counseling if you are not an active member of a church? FI and I were both raised in the church and have very strong faith but since niether of us live near the churches we were raised in we don't really go anywhere on a regular basis. We have been together for almost 8 years so there doesn't seem to be many things left that haven't been discussed and we are extremely open with each other so it's not like I feel like we absolutley have to get counseling but I don't think it can hurt. I know there are non-church counseling options, but I don't want to do that. Just wondering what other people are doing....

[Ana]

I think alot of people don't get counselling and that's ok. My FI and I are going to do the Marriage Prep course at our church nearby because if we want to have a Catholic ceremony its pretty much required. Otherwise I don't think we would do it. If you have relationship with good communication and openess you're probably doing all the right things. With that said, I've met alot of couples that once they get engaged focus solely on the wedding prep, or at least focus a lot of time on it, and don't focus on the relationship. Some of them end up just looking at eachother after the wedding and going "now what?" because they have become so disconnected from eachother. So I think in cases like that couples should maybe do some counselling. It can't hurt.

[IrieBride08]

My FI and I went through premarital counseling at my mother's church. They had a marriage class with about 8 other couples and we all went through it together. I actually liked that option and found it beneficial, but part of me wouldn't have minded doing a marriage counseling session with just us and a pastor couple. You may want to check around with some local churches because some of them have marriage classes, etc. that you might enjoy.

[Alyssa]

we did non-religious pre-marital counseling and it was awesome! we did it for a couple of months and it made what was already a strong, solid relationship even better

[amy706]

Alyssa- where did you do the non-religious counselling? I dont currently belong to a church in my area but would love to do some sort of pre-marital counseling!

[StephanieMN]

We are actually in the counseling now and I love it. What I did was look under the enrich/prepare program and found someone in our area who wasn't with a church. It has been wonderful! DO a google search on Enrich counseling and their site will help you find someone in your area.

[Alyssa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by amy706 Alyssa- where did you do the non-religious counselling? I dont currently belong to a church in my area but would love to do some sort of pre-marital counseling!

Amy,
we went to a therapy group with a therapist who specialized in couples, family and marital issues.
FI's mom is a marriage counselor so she gave us some links and info in our town. I would go through your health insurance co. 1st if you can - for instance, we have BC/BS - "mental health" - (that is what they call it) outpatient visits are unlimited for the year but no annual deductible and a $15 copay per visit (if you stay in the network). so 1st step, call your Ins. co or FI's Ins co., find out what your out-patient mental health visit coverage is, get a list of providers, call and ask questions until you find one who specializes in marriage / family / couples counseling and then make an appt with 2 or 3 so you can see if it is a good fit!

GOOD LUCK!

[BrittneyD]

FI and I are in pre-marital counseling right now. There was a huge waiting list at the church we are currently attending, so we found a pastor on Pre-pare and enrich. This is the best decision we have made. I highly recommend pre-marital counseling. There were issues we didn't even recognize we had, and we were able to work through them. We will probably continue with some time of marital counseling after the wedding, just to keep growing in our relationship.

[superez]

We ended up having to take a one-day marriage prep course since we are getting married through the Catholic Church. At first we were not looking forward to it and thought that since we have been together for 10 years we didn't really need it. However, we ended up thoroughly enjoying it and found it to be a very moving, spiritual experience that brought us even closer together. The good thing was that we found we are on the same page with pretty much everything (finances, communication, etc). So in a nutshell I would highly recommend it!

[amy706]

Really helpful! I think I'm definitely going to do that. THANK YOU!