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On the verge of a melt down,


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#1 TammyB

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    Posted 12 December 2006 - 11:55 AM

    Girls, I'm seriously on the verge of a break down. With everything going on with Marty, (Cain's Ma) Cain working a ton of hours and I'm not seeing him except on the weekends now, the volunteer work I'm doing for the dog rescue, planning this wedding and now our foster dog is getting worse and I don't think she'll make it through the winter months.. I'm just stressed beyond belief. I'm a perfectionist and I'm sure that makes it worse, I'm at the point that I feel I can't make my mind up on anything anymore. I posted last week a pick of some chocolate and green individual cakes, well I got an email back from Sweet Dreams, they quoted them at $25.00 each. I emailed Jennifer Hatton and she gave me the same price. I'm just so overwhelmed with decisions that I can't make one of them. I envy you girls that are already married, I just don't know how you did it... I'm just so stressed that I just want it all over with...

    #2 Janet

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      Posted 12 December 2006 - 01:11 PM

      Hey Tammy,

      I'm sorry you are feeling so stressed....big hugs!!!!!!! I might suggest that you just put off the wedding planning for a few weeks, until things get better in other areas, like maybe until January. You are so far in your planning I'm sure it would be okay to put that aside.

      Also, make sure to take care of yourself however you can...go to the gym, get a manicure, retail therapy, more sleep...whatever you can do to pamper yourself a little bit?

      #3 Natalie Z

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        Posted 12 December 2006 - 02:04 PM

        Hey tammy, I agree with Janet you need to take care of yourself first and foremost! Do something that you love and will help you relax! I feel horrible for you! I wish you could kick that B***h out!(sorry for the language) She is just a mean woman and you don't deserve it! I think you should just put off wedding planning for a couple weeks as Janet suggested! It seems like you have everything planned out for the most part so I'm sure it will be ok! I wish I could do more for you!

        #4 TammyWright

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        Posted 12 December 2006 - 02:18 PM

        oh, tammy!! i am so sorry...the holidays can get really stressful...i remember this time last year, i was a WRECK! i just thought my wedding would neer get planned and would turn into one huge cluster-f*ck...so i took a break from wedding planning...and it really helped.

        i agree with janet...you are so ahead, it wouldn't hurt to take a break.

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        #5 A10CalGal

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          Posted 12 December 2006 - 03:14 PM

          Ditto to all of the above Tammy! I think you will be relieved & feel a diminished level of stress if you give yourself permission to take a break from planning. Really, it's ok!

          I think we have all gone through this to a degree. I know I did back in June/July when I felt like I had to do EVERYTHING. I took a month long break & then slowly started picking away at things after that. Small bites!



          #6 NABUMBAH

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            Posted 12 December 2006 - 03:15 PM

            Quote:
            Originally Posted by TAMMYM
            Girls, I'm seriously on the verge of a break down. With everything going on with Marty, (Cain's Ma) Cain working a ton of hours and I'm not seeing him except on the weekends now, the volunteer work I'm doing for the dog rescue, planning this wedding and now our foster dog is getting worse and I don't think she'll make it through the winter months.. I'm just stressed beyond belief. I'm a perfectionist and I'm sure that makes it worse, I'm at the point that I feel I can't make my mind up on anything anymore. I posted last week a pick of some chocolate and green individual cakes, well I got an email back from Sweet Dreams, they quoted them at $25.00 each. I emailed Jennifer Hatton and she gave me the same price. I'm just so overwhelmed with decisions that I can't make one of them. I envy you girls that are already married, I just don't know how you did it... I'm just so stressed that I just want it all over with...
            welcome to my world, sweetie.

            I swear, it will all be okay.

            #7 KARLA

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              Posted 12 December 2006 - 03:17 PM

              Tammy,

              You do not have to have EVERYTHING figured out right now!!

              You still have plenty of time... trust me, I setup the beach bonfire dinner when I got to Cabo AND my rehearsal dinner was changed last minute, so it was setup in matter of days!!

              Take a break, ENJOY the holidays and then get back into wedding planning.

              #8 Sarah

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                Posted 12 December 2006 - 03:20 PM

                Tammy, I think we've all been there with you. It's so hard when we have to have everything perfect and the world just won't comply!
                I also know the added stress you feel because of the little foster dog. I have a very soft heart for animals too and have done foster work of my own (used to foster greyhounds). It takes alot out of you when you have an animal suffering. It sounds like the little guy has some major issues. Have they done bloodwork and checked kidney & liver function? What about diabetes? All of these things can cause inappropriate soiling in the house and a general decline in health. I know you know what happens in that case, we won't go there...Just wondering what diagnostics have been done, that's all.
                Hang in there girl- don't worry about the wedding right now. You seriously do not have to deal with cake and flowers for like another 3 months. I know you want to get it out of the way now, but I think you need to focus on the other aspects of your life right now. Take a break- the wedding will still be waiting for you in a few weeks!


                #9 gkashmira

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                  Posted 12 December 2006 - 05:42 PM

                  I second everything everyone has said and just wanted to add this:

                  You are an amzing friend to all of us - you always have a kind word, a sound opinion and a helpfulness that I know makes all our our lives easier. You deserve to be happy and to be able to enjoy the experience of planning your wedding. It doesn't all have to be done right now - seriously it really doesn't You can literally wait until a week for the wedding to decide what cakes to get! Is there a night or day or sometime (any time) this weekend or in the next few weeks where both you and Cain have some time off?

                  I thinkyou guys should put everything to the side for a night/day and go do something fun and light-hearted - ice-skating! snowboarding! a romantic dinner, a movie, anything it doesn't matter what. Jus the two of you and before the "date" starts you both agree that this will be all about fun stuff and no stress! That means no wedding planning, no Marty (b*tch!) talk, no dog talk (poor little guy!) just you two havign fun and remembering why you're together ad getting married in the first place.
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                  #10 TammyB

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                    Posted 12 December 2006 - 06:04 PM

                    Thanks Kash.. You gals are all right, I need to stop and take a break from all of this. (If I can) I know I shouldn't worry about cakes of flowers and such this early, shoot some brides plan their weddings in 1-3 months and I still have about 6. I just miss my Papa's (that would be Cain) and he really helps me de-stress by him acting silly all the time..




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