cantorballard

Hi everyone! I would like to offer a recommendation of resorts, if you are considering Riviera Maya for your wedding. I just returned from my 4th wedding at Iberostar, Paraiso Maya, and it is truly the best. Lily, the head WC is absolutely amazing. She makes you feel like you are the most important family on the property, and she goes way above and beyond to make your wedding dreams come true. Lily has been on top of every detail, and she is friendly, happy, and eager to please. The food there is amazing, and they have a beautiful chuppah and she understands all the Jewish traditions. I highly recommend the venue! Enjoy! Cantor Deb

In case you are still searching, I just returned from the DR, and I travel there several times a year, because there is no Rabbi down there to officiate Jewish weddings. You have to "import" your officiant. The only Rabbis in the Caribbean require Jewish-Jewish weddings, and that they be Kosher. I'm happy to help in any way possible. Cantor Debbi Ballard

Most resorts I see have a standard structure they use, that is often used as a chuppah. Have you checked with your coordinator to see what they can do? In a pinch - Walmart sells lightweight curtain rods. Buy 4. You can bring a tallis, or any piece of material, should be 6' x 6', or maybe a little less, and bring lots of tape. You can tape the material to the rods (which pack nicely in any suitcase) and voila - you have a hand held chuppah. It's a nice way to honor 4 guests. by asking them to hold it. Otherwise, as long as the gazebo is open on the sides, that is also your chuppah. I've been very "creative" quite often! Cantor Debbi Ballard

Dear RSidman, There are literally no Rabbi's in Mexico - not only to co-officiate, but to perform anything but an Orthodox style wedding. (Both Jewish, kosher food, etc.) I perform about 10-20 weddings a year in Mexico, many of those are co-officiated, but the only way to have an authentic Jewish clergy is to hire one from the states. Best wishes!

Dear MDLady, If you have hired your dj, ask him to search for Bobby Morgenstern's wedding cd's. They have recordings for the hora, siman tov/mazel tov, heveinu shalom aleichem, etc. (mixes all in one) It should be a relatively easy cd for most dj's to find. Morgenstern has the most widely used Jewish music.

Hi Ladies - Just thought I would offer the advice that all of my Mexico (and most other DW location) brides have their civil ceremonies in the states, and perform the Religious/Spiritual ceremony at the destination. I highly recommend this, as there is never any question about documentation, and you have no legal grey areas. Also - dear Mexicobride - a challah recipe is very difficult to translate into how to cook in Mexico! The altitude is different, the water is different, and so I have seen many of the resorts attempt to make a challah - but it is SO hard to get right! I usually bring a challah with me, when I officiate in Mexico. It might get a little squished -but it's so much better than what results when they try to make it! Lastly, learning the components of a Jewish wedding is simple - anyone can pull it up on the internet, and script something out. But, it's usually at times like very meaningful lifecycles, that anyone who wants the presence of Jewish tradition will want someone more authentic to perform the ceremony. That's why people seek out Rabbis and Cantors to perform their weddings. I find that even the most non practicing Jews (and non Jews alike) want the "real deal" to solemnize their wedding. They feel it gives more credibility to the holiness of their marriage. But if that is not an issue and your local officiant will read a script, then that is an easy way to include the rituals and traditions of your faith. Hope that helps!! Debbi

To answer your question about Jewish ceremonies in all of RM (and most of the East coast of Mexico) - the resorts themselves do not have Jewish officiants. They will refer you directly to the only Rabbi in the area, and you will have to contact him directly, however he only officiates Jewish (Non Interfaith) and he will requires Kosher food. Most RM brides import a Jewish officiant, if they wish to have a Jewish wedding.

I've done weddings at both resorts - all you have to do is let them know you are providing your own religious officiant, but you still need to arrange for the civil as well. Your planner wherever you book will accommodate - the resorts are top notch and very sophisticated wedding professionals. Good luck!

I'm at MP right now, as I type, and I have to say, this has officially become my FAVORITE resort! The amenities are absolutely amazing- including wireless everywhere, a great coffee lounge with computers, tv's, internet, lots of great restaurants, and staff that are the most attentive of anywhere I've been in RM. The rooms are amazing, though the only drawback is that this place is humongous, and walking from a room to the wedding location could take a while, but they have golf carts that drive around, so it isn't terribly bad. I especially love that the weddings are held further down the beach, so you won't have onlookers gawking at you, like they do in every other DW I have ever performed. It is incredibly private, well managed, and I can't recommend it highly enough. If you have already booked - you can take a sigh of relief. You are in for a wonderful treat! Debbi

When I stayed at the Riu Palace in RM, we could access Internet in the lobby, but not in the rooms.

Tammy - I am really confused - I cannot find anywhere in the User cp to add the vendor banner to my signature/profile. Please let me know where to go!

A good wedding coordinator in your destination resort should have no problem working this out for you - but you should decide, then, if you want to make the legal ceremony public, or perhaps, as many of my clients do - have the legal ceremony privately, and then your relgious/spiritual ceremony as the one your guests participate in. If you want to make both public, then ask your coordinator to allow your Aunt/Uncle to contact the local officiant beforehand, to see if they can plan out the ceremony. Then, the local officiant can make the pronouncement, and your Aunt and Uncle can "present" the couple for the first time. I've done that a few times... Debbi

A good wedding coordinator in your destination resort should have no problem working this out for you - but you should decide, then, if you want to make the legal ceremony public, or perhaps, as many of my clients do - have the legal ceremony privately, and then your relgious/spiritual ceremony as the one your guests participate in. If you want to make both public, then ask your coordinator to allow your Aunt/Uncle to contact the local officiant beforehand, to see if they can plan out the ceremony. Then, the local officiant can make the pronouncement, and your Aunt and Uncle can "present" the couple for the first time. I've done that a few times... Debbi

Tammy - I've sent a couple of requests for pricing for a premiere vendor - can you please let me know what that entails? Thanks!

A good officiant will have a fully functional website, and a readily visible phone number. Try googling them, and see what comes up. There are several sites that will refer officiants to you...Try Decidio.com, Wedding Wire, Eventective, etc. Are you looking for a civil or religious ceremony?

Quote: Originally Posted by mummergirl since you are interfaith and don't want too much religious stuff, you could consider including mexican wedding traditions instead. do a google search for mexican wedding traditions. there is something about 13 coins (arras), and there's a lasso (el lazo) ceremony. The Mexican Unity Ceremony is beautiful, but you might want to modify it. The Lasso is actually a Rosary, more of a religious symbol than a traditional/symbolic one. And, the 13 coins are representative of Christ and His disciples. Again, maybe more religious than you want, not to mention possibly offensive to the Jewish side of the family - just trying to be sensitive. Cantor Debbi Ballard

You probably want to include the most important Jewish rituals, like, The chuppa, breaking of the glass, and a kiddush (wine blessing) I also like to incorporate The Lord's Prayer into my ceremonies, as it is predominantly Catholic, but was originally a Jewish prayer. I also love performing a sand ceremony, as symbolism of 2 individuals coming together, retaining their original form, but in a new surrounding together. There are several other Jewish rituals though, that you might consider - like a modern day artwork and text ketubah, and even a universalist version of The Seven Blessings. Hope this helps. Cantor Debbi Ballard

I often have my grooms leave a pair of flipflops under the chuppa prior to the ceremony, for breaking the glass. And most of the time, we use the lightbulb, because even with shoes on, a wine glass, if it is not a delicate crystal one, will be extremely difficult to break, and results in many injuries. You should take advantage of being married in the sand by walking barefoot in your processional, but just have the flipflops waiting for you when you get there! Debbi

Alyssa - The response I posted yesterday, was meant for Neen, who posted on 10/22, asking about proper wording for an intro to the 7 blessings. It was not meant for you, but it was on the same post. I am usually very careful to make sure I am replying to a current request, which was what I did. Sorry for the inconvenience, Debbi

Neen, Here is my introduction to the Seven Blessings. Feel free to use what you wish Seven Blessings/Sheva B´rachot (I read –Tallit wrapped around both) In a traditional Jewish wedding ceremony the Bride circles the groom seven times which represents the Kabbalistic idea of the earth revolving around the sun seven times to complete the creation. Today I place the tallit around X and Y to symbolize the idea of wholeness and completion and to define a protective circle around them. I recite the seven blessings (Sheva Barochot) which begins with the traditional recitation of the blessing over the 2nd cup of wine. The blessings I invoke join the new couple to their new community of other married couples, and we pray for them to live a life of celebration and joy in their community.

You are going to love it! I have officiated 2 weddings there, and the Riu is a great place to be. Are you getting married in the center gazebo? It is such a beautiful backdrop. I have pictures on my Facebook page, if you want to look. It is the wedding of Dan & Rita. (Login | Facebook) The resort is beautiful. The food is great. I really enjoyed the wedding dinner, and the DJ was excellent too. The wedding coordinator works very hard to make sure you have everything you need. Best of luck on your wedding! You picked a great location! Debbi

Jenn, There is absolutely no norm in regards to what you do for your vows. Your ceremony should reflect your own personal choices, so that is a matter you discuss personally with your officiant. He/She should accommodate you with whatever method you feel is best for your ceremony! I especially love when brides/grooms want to go outside the norms, and create some special energy or thoughts to their ceremonies. We create the vows together, even if I read, and they repeat - at least the vows reflect exactly what they want to commit publicly to each other. Hope this helps! Debbi

Hi My little Jenni darling! Fancy meeting you here! Deb

Alyssa, Your Father could read the Priestly Blessing (Birkat Cohanim) or otherwise known as Y'varech'cha, though it is very short. I really like the English/modified version of the Seven Blessings that Erin B posted above. Other than that, there is not much more that goes into a traditional wedding, but in my ceremonies - I quite often use the Apache Wedding blessing. The only other blessing, is the Shehecheyanu, which blesses G-d for bringing us to this special time. Hope this helps. Debbi

I definitely agree that this is unusual, but...as an officiant, and one who prides herself on professionalism and customer service, one thing that I urge everyone to do, is to have a written agreement in place with all of your vendors, before any money is changed hands, or commitment is made, or planning begins. That being said, $225 is a pretty low price, especially for a DW. And for the most part - you get what you pay for, when hiring a wedding vendor. I hate when wedding officiants nickle and dime you, and start putting costs on the individual components of your ceremony. That's unprofessional, and a sign of someone inexperienced. At this point, what are your choices? If you don't have many, then tell her you will not move forward with her, until she sends you a document (or write one up, send it to her, and ask her to sign it) to confirm every last possible charge she is thinking of. In the end, she will control the marriage certificate, if she is your legal officiant of record. (Another benefit to having your civil ceremony in the US) so she will hold the upper hand. Don't let it get to the point where she holds you hostage for an extra few hundred, just to hand over the certificate. Word of advice to all - spell all of your details out in advance, and get written agreements on everything!! It will save lots of heartache as you get closer to the wedding. You don't need these headaches! Debbi