Should you have an AHR - my thoughts

I was thinking of doing a luau theme for the AHR so it would be laid back. I had a luau many years ago before I met FI and it was a hit. I told everyone they had to come dressed and they did! It was awesome.

Guess I could have read this before posting my AHR vs. Bon Voyag thread. I actually am more the one who doesn't want to leave anybody out more than FI and I'm sure some of our family members who can't make it to Jamaica really want to celebrate with us, so may be it is more for others. FI is totally like DW and that's it but at first the Bon Voyage party was his idea. We had to cancel our engagement party and that was what I really wanted to do and I would have been satisfied with that for those who couldn't make it to Jamaica, so I'm still up in the air about it. I guess when it gets closer and we can see who all will be in Jamaica that may help me decide. I just want maybe like a cocktail party thing nothing big or too fancy not a full blown reception. Thank you all for the input.

This is a great thread. My initial reaction is that I do not want to have an AHR. I don't feel as though I have the time nor energy to plan TWO big parties. I plan to invite the people whom we most want to be with us to our wedding. If most can come...I don't feel the need to have a AHR. On the other hand...if many can't come....what to do? The FI's mother asked if we were going to do an AHR...:SIGH:

Also....does anyone feel that once folks know that there will be an AHR that they try less hard to make it to the destination wedding?

My favorite part of attending wedding, and being in a wedding party, has been the reception. Maybe that's a southern thing, I'm not sure, but we are planning to have an AHR for us and our guests. My dad is one of 13 and one of the youngest at about 45 years old, I have over 100 immediate family members just on his side of the family ranging from about 65-newborn. I know that not many people could make the DW, but we want it because it is personal and for us. Whoever wants to come is more than welcome, but we do not want to put on a show. We aren't planning to have a reception in Mexico, just after the ceremony have dinner and hang out as if on vaca (cuz we will be) with whoever is there with us.

We want to come home and probably in about 2 weeks (ASAP) have a reception. Probably just rent a KC Hall or something, gets lots of beer, have my uncles cook up some amazing brisket and jambalaya, I have had a DJ picked out since I was a kid (the only part of my wedding I knew I wanted, haha), and just party it up. My cousin who is closest to my age got married this past June... when I caught the bouquet and my FI caught the garter, the pressure was on! Of course a month later we got engaged, but I feel that celebrating with all of our family and friends is a big deal for us, and we will spend most of that time together. We also plan to have the wedding cake there, etc. Traditional stuff. So I feel like having a AHR is important to me, not just people I know can't get to Mexico.

This is awesome. I want my Mother to read it. I only want one party... at my destination. If we must have one locally I want what you had... a party in a yard. Thank goodness i am not alone - i was starting to feel like a selfish B*tch